Everything's weird and messed up. When it comes to love, I stumbled. As for D, I gave up. Like seriously. I thought I'm getting better but really, I'm just getting used to the pain. He'll be a part of hurtful memories of mine. Memories which I won't try to remember in my life again. I'm not gonna waste a single time missing everything about us. It's time for me to move on. And in fact, I'm moving on already without you. Thanks buddy for always giving me advices! I'm fine now, really. It's a new phase of life. Like what I always say, find a guy who treasure you, who dotes on you, who truly loves you. But when this reality happens on me, I stumbled. It's weird. It came too fast or should I said I have no feelings for you? I couldn't commit. I wanted more of a 'play' relationship maybe? I don't want to be tied up and giving in efforts which eventually becomes shit. Or maybe should I say I don't believe in love anymore? There's no such thing as 'forever' seriously. It's only a matter of time when the other party gets sick and tired of you. And perhaps D was fast ahead of me. So I wouldn't blame him. I'm not that seriously a faithful person either. I'll get sick and tired of another party too. That's why relationship for me is always short. Ok, I sound like a total bitch I know. But we are all so young and carefree, who wants to get tied down so early? I want chaos and mess. I want to play. People said I've changed, changed too much, changed to another person. Well, here's the honest truth. I grew up. I stopped letting people push me around all the time. I learned that you can't always be happy. I accepted reality. I'm tired of people telling me what to do and trying to live up to everyone's expectations. I enjoy being me. Maybe thats just me.